Ritual: No Ordinary Act
Last year, many of us missed out on big life events. We had to reschedule or cancel weddings, birthdays, graduations, and even memorials. We may have taken notice of their importance during the time of their absence or maybe just shrugged it off and let it go. Personally, it didn’t occur to me until recently just how necessary these markers are for celebration, but more importantly, the crossing of the threshold of which each of these ceremonies define.
Like many people, I missed out on a graduation ceremony last year. Yes, I graduated from graduate school, but it was in my one-bedroom apartment, alone, by receiving the FedEx’ed piece of paper that said so. I had been looking forward to donning the traditional cap and gown alongside the beloved group of eight others that had taken this transformational two-year journey with me. It seems a bit silly to have wanted that so much, but I haven’t worked quite this hard for anything in my life and I was proud of this dedicated finish to the end.
Throughout the following year, I hadn’t thought much of it, but as a cohort, we decided to come together and perform our own graduation ceremony on the campus where we had learned so much about ourselves and each other. Circled beneath the oak trees on the deserted campus, we came together in a non-traditional fashion to recognize our achievement. The ceremony was our own creation and was what we needed to define the threshold of passing from student to graduate. That moment, which had been absent, allowed for our conscious awareness to understand that that time was over. No more sitting in the waiting room, in limbo, undefined. It wasn’t until then that I realized how much it was needed to have the subtle permission to move forward.
There is often a sense of loss with a great sense of excitement of what’s yet to come. Once one passes that threshold, you become a new you. You sense that you will never be the same as you leave that you behind. As we go through life, we start to realize that the journey is complete, though it does not end, and as we continue to shed what we once were and grow into our new roles, we can look towards the realm of possibility of what lies ahead. In order to leave behind what was, we need to feel that it has passed and it’s time to move forward. Ritual is the tool in which we change that mindset into the new.
When you step into Saltwater, the front door is a threshold; literally and symbolically. As you step in from the outside world, you know why you are there. Your body knows why you are there. If you have noticed, every session begins and ends a particular way each time. This is for you as much as it is for me to feel and know the beginning and the close of a session. Though it is not named, it is no less a necessary ritual.
In ceremony, ritual is used as a symbolic act to bridge the conscious and unconscious. It is, simply put, an intentional shift in consciousness. Acts of ritual can be small and simple, but they are simply a way to bring a moment, a space, a journey into a place of meaning. Without ritual, it feels like something is missing. Blowing out birthday candles to celebrate another year on earth is as much a ritual as morning coffee is to mark the beginning of a day. Ritual is also in our everyday lives, if we pay attention to what we’re doing and how we’re doing it.
Ceremony and ritual are not reserved for religion, for our ancestors, or for big life events. Pay attention to the meaningful acts of daily life that change your mindset: Putting on your seatbelt, getting dressed for the day, getting dressed for bed, opening or closing your laptop, brushing your teeth, sitting down for a meal, removing your shoes… All of which are acts of ritual to remind you that, I am here, in this space, in this moment, for this purpose. By bringing ritual into our daily lives, we can welcome each new moment with intention; and perhaps then we can be present, attentive and receive it with its absolute purpose.
—
gp
